Mindfulness Lesson: Setting Expectations

Setting Expectations When Practicing Mindfulness

6 year old Xander using his "Mindful Ninja" pose

 to reduce anxiety before a school play.

Mindfulness practice is more about developing a mutual respect than with rigid rule following. If Mindfulness is perceived as fun, the child will more likely make it a ritual.  The practice gets more familiar with repetition, however establishing expectations early on is the best way to create a safe environment where all participants feel their time is respected.


Child's Mind by Charles Willard is an excellent tool to illustrate boundaries for Mindfulness Meditation with children. Willard lists the below as quality expectations that encourage participation, not rigidity.

• Remain as quiet as possible
• Raise hands to ask a question
• Use a talking stick or stone to establish listening boundaries

The book also points out that older children may participate in establishing expectations.  This partnership will empower the child that this is their practice, and they have a voice in how it is managed.

When introducing Mindfulness to children of all ages, it is important to keep the lessons light hearted, brief, and fun.  If a child does not respect your established expectations during a one on one lesson, go with their lead and switch the lesson for that day.  Language may be "This work might be for another time.  What do you want to do?"  This is where the teachers personal practice will be instrumental in remaining patient and resourceful. As Jon Kabat Zinn would say, "Meet the child where they are."  If a child is being disruptive in a group setting, gently remind the child that they do not have to participate, however they need to respect their peers desire to practice in a safe environment with no disruptions.